Brickwall Radio has Blasted

Sunday's show was amazing! I am in awe of God's greatness! Loving me some my God!!! Grateful for all my guests and listeners. God cover and keep them! Propel them into greatness!Favor reign in their lives! Amen! If you missed it go to www.blogtalkradio.com/brickwallradio. Actress Meagan Tandy, Designer Lameka Weeks of HeightGoddes.com, Andre Baxter of Christine Designs by Andre Millinery, Craig Adams of Adams Int'l House of Fashion, and Stellar Nominated Jai Reed were wonderful guests. Will post their links

Don't rely on what you see and what you hear, EVER! Why? Because these things are temporal for your everlasting life! You must put your everything in God for your every outcome! YES, EVERYTHING! I know for myself that its easier said than done, but please do so! That's my prayer for you today to put your TRUST in God! Be Encouraged world!

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Surviving and growing stronger. Encouraged and determined to be an ENCOURAGER. I needed to share my heart so hear I am praying that at least 1 person is blessed so it will not be in vain.

Saturday, April 17, 2010

Truthful

Truthfully, I am so concerned about our babies because I am 37yoa and still suffering from the effects of my past. I never really shared what has happened to me in detail and still uncomfortable with sharing. I never told my family and only bits and pieces to friends. Well, just a slight glimpse into my pain is I believe deeply that due to my childhood traumas I was very promiscuious. I lashed out for sex before sex came to me. Truthfully, the approach and touch of a man terrifies me. Especially, an old man coming towards me. Many older men made unsolicited and reproachable comments to me. I was a little girl. I had so many hopes and dreams. I was self-confident. Somewhere in the midst of my chaos I lost me. I became this numb girl trying to cope with what was done to me. I didn't turn to drugs, but aggressive behavior towards men and trying to find true love consumed me. So, I am 37yoa and the first true love I know is that shared between my son and I. Our love is pure, unadulterated, and unpolluted love of a mother and child. So, that pushes me to pray for others and their babies. I lost my firstborn at 22 1/2 weeks. She lived approx 2hrs with just a heartbeat and undeveloped lungs. Why I lost her is unknown, but I feel great guilt and unmeasurable pain. I can't imagine how families go on after losing children they have loved for years. The pain and guilt is consumable. Well, thats truth for now. I encourage you to pray daily for others as well as for yourself.

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